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I remember when I first thought about goals. It was the time I was getting out of university and stepping into the corporate world. I was going to have a regular monthly salary and I would be financially independent. There was a lot of talk about dreams and visualizations and what one wanted to do and be.

One of the things being talked about among the passing-out cohort was the kind of car they wanted to buy. I made the mistake of mentioning how my target is to purchase a Maruti 800 (the smallest car available in the market at that time) within a year of starting work. The polite ones smirked silently and the rude ones guffawed out loud – if you are dreaming, at least dream big, they said.

I felt embarrassed at the moment and let it be! Was I silly to have such small ambitions? Was I not able to recognize my potential? Was I letting myself down?

Twenty years hence, I know why I thought the way I did and how it helped me navigate my path.

Setting Big Goals is a Bane

goals

Image by photosforyou from Pixabay

How many times have you set a goal for yourself and then let it just pass? How often have you decided you will get onto that healthy diet from tomorrow or work more productively or maintain work-life balance or clean your room, only to start that whole process over again after a few weeks because you never really started the previous time?

It is almost sacrilegious to state that goal setting is a bane. It has been drilled into us to such an extent that almost everyone now knows that we should set SMART goals. And yet, these goals get visualized, written, set, and decided upon only to be abandoned before they even start sometimes. So why setting goals a bane, especially in the way we are doing it now?

Based on the external environment – We are often compelled to create these goals based on what other people are doing in and around us. If you are studying in grade 12, then university is your goal. If you are getting out of university, then a job is your goal. Of course, you have some flexibility in deciding which university or what job!

Goals are overwhelming – The problem with goals is that they are overwhelming. Dreaming about starting a company and making it big may resonate with you all the time. However, the moment you start thinking of getting into action mode, you are likely to get anxious about all that needs to be done. Funding, business plan, hiring, technical support, investments, content creation, marketing – words like these are likely to flash in your head. What is more likely to happen is that you will find an excuse that helps you explain to yourself and others why you have not moved into action.

Helpful only on successful achievement – The thing is that goals give us a good feeling only when we achieve them. There is no joy in starting a new company. The joy comes only if it brings in a certain amount of revenue that you define as success. There is no joy in playing a sport. There is joy only if you win. There is no joy in running on the treadmill or on the track. There is only joy when you see the scales drop your weight by a few kilos. The dopamine kicks in only when you see the results.

Harmful when not met – Setting goals can indeed be harmful if we do not achieve them. The actual achievement of the goals that we set out to achieve is not really in our total control. When we create large goals, we also sacrifice a lot of our current time and energy towards something that is not guaranteed. The dejection and feeling of being a loser that follows can be very difficult to manage. The extent to which one feels dejected is the value that one assigns to that goal.

So, should one give up setting goals altogether? Would we not become directionless if we do something like that?

Small Goals are the Answer

Setting reachable goals that are not decades away is the key to more action, more movement, more fulfillment, and more happiness. Here are some points in favor of small goals:

  • Small goals get started and more often than not, achieved
  • Small goals do not scare the hell out of us
  • Small goals make us feel that we are more in control (and that feeling of control has been associated with happiness levels in research)
  • Making a list of small goals and ticking them off, one at a time can boost confidence like nothing else
  • Small goals remind us that we are able and capable
  • Small goals help us stay in the here and now and keep us away from building castles in the air

How to Practice the Small Goal Technique

goals

Which ladder is likely to take you to the top? Which one will be easier to climb? Would you even attempt the ladder on the left?

Setting small goals does not mean that we do not think big. It does not mean that we limit ourselves and forget our true potential. The technique that I recommend is Visualization, followed by Plan and Park. (Shall we call it the VPP technique?)

Step 1 – Set in a comfortable place and visualize your dream as vividly as you can. Be grounded and calm when you attempt it. Think of as many aspects of how things are when you have achieved your goal. Who is with you, what do you hear, what are people saying about you, how are you feeling, what do you see, what do you hear, where are you, and as many other things that you can think of.

Step 2 – Write it down!

Step 3 –Think and plan the things you need to do to get there and the things you need to avoid. This is a general list of the things you need to do and not a drill-down of specific. It does not have to be specific, time-bound, or measurable.

Step 4 – Once you know the general direction in which you want to move, park the plan.

Step 5 – Focus on today and what you can do today.

The reason this helps is that:

  • the visualization serves as a guiding light for you to operate on a daily basis
  • you do not say yes to opportunities that take you away from your long-term goal
  • you move in the general direction of your goal
  • you stay flexible and adaptable and able to react to the external circumstances as they present themselves
  • you are not fazed by unexpected events

This balanced approach towards goal-setting helps in keeping all the negatives of goal setting at bay, all the time providing the guidance and motivation you need to move on and take action!

If you want to experience the VPP technique, visualize your goals, and learn how to get started, contact us and let’s get coaching.

PS: By the way, the first car that I did purchase was a Maruti Zen (a bigger car than what I had planned for) and since then have owned 2 more cars, each bigger than the previous one. One does not have to stop at the first achievable goal. It IS a rolling target and that’s a great thing if you enjoy what you are doing!

 

Feature Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay