{"id":2728,"date":"2020-08-07T10:00:00","date_gmt":"2020-08-07T10:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/shiwanigurwara.com\/oldsite2\/?p=2728"},"modified":"2020-08-07T18:46:02","modified_gmt":"2020-08-07T13:16:02","slug":"the-circle-of-emotions-sadness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/shiwanigurwara.com\/oldsite2\/2020\/08\/07\/the-circle-of-emotions-sadness\/","title":{"rendered":"The Circle of Emotions \u2013 Sadness"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I recently revisited one of my favorite Pixar movies, Inside Out<\/em>, and remember this dialogue that the emotion Sadness tells Joy, when asked to stop crying because all the emotions are trying to make Riley (protagonist) happy:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cCrying helps me slow down and obsess over the weight of life\u2019s problems\u201d<\/strong><\/em><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

I have to admit that sadness is one of my favorite emotions and I am going to totally love writing about it. I just hope I can keep it to word limit target I have given myself to make the post more readable.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

How Do We Look at Sadness?<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Sadness is almost looked upon as a disease these days. Not only do people stay away from those who are sad, they also feel awkward and uncomfortable when they are in the presence of someone going through a tough time. We also do not want to see ourselves as someone who is pulling the vibe or energy levels of a place down. So, we hide it from others and we hide it from ourselves too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Looking at sadness in this manner has taken away the one biggest strength that this emotion has \u2013 the ability to connect us with other people.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We are expected to put on a mask and show to the world that we are immune to disappointment, frustration, grief, setbacks, and discomfort. The effort that it takes to keep that mask on, all the time, takes away vital life force away from us.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One of the main reasons why sadness has become such an unwanted emotion today, is because it is considered to be an unproductive emotion. It does not propel you to action. On the other hand, sadness makes you stop doing whatever you are doing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Our social structure tells us to \u2018toughen up\u2019, \u2018take things in your stride\u2019, and \u2018get over it\u2019 and we take the message home that no one wants to be in the presence of a sad person and no one wants to hear about what you are going through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Since we are constantly looking for external validation via likes on Facebook and followers on Twitter or Instagram, we make extra effort to appear \u2018not sad\u2019 and \u2018joyous\u2019 all the time. Facebook sees uploads of vacation pictures and birthday bashes, Instagram is all about your talents, looks, and video skills, and LinkedIn, too, is a place to only tout your achievements, success, certifications. None of these virtual platforms applaud those sharing their grief, hard time, or challenges.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Necessity of Sadness<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n
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Image by DanaTentis<\/a> from Pixabay<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Sadness is a warning sign that comes with a lot of loss of energy. We feel still, unable to move, or act productively. In fact, the emotion sadness tells us to stop and take a deeper look inside and to figure out the real reasons for things not being the way you want them to be. It is a call for us to connect with ourselves at another level.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sadness also tells us to take better care of ourselves. It is a sign for us to indulge in some rest and relaxation and allow ourselves some time off from the madness around us to recuperate and get back (by obsessing over the weight of life\u2019s problems, as mentioned by the emotion Sadness in the movie Inside-Out<\/em>).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It is this melancholy feeling that has given rise to some of the most poignant pieces of art, music, creativity, and understanding of self and the universe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When we fight sadness and do not allow it to ourselves, we tell ourselves that sadness is a sign of weakness. In such criticism of a feeling, we also take away our own ability to self-actualize.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When we do not allow our sadness to manifest, we also miss out on connecting with the people who would otherwise stand with us during tough times. In fact, we miss out on this major opportunity of making real and deep connections with other people that can transform into meaningful relationships.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Managing Sadness<\/span><\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

When we ignore feelings of sadness and put on a mask for the outside world (and often for ourselves too), we continue to lose energy; the energy that we are being told we do not have and need to preserve. We get up in the morning and go about our daily tasks as if there is nothing that needs attending to. With such utter depletion of energy, we push ourselves deeper into a depressive state\u2026the kind of depression that most people cannot see behind the mask of (so-called) normalcy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Chinese proverb goes like this:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYou can\u2019t prevent the birds of sadness from flying around your head, but you can prevent them from making a nest in your hair.<\/em>\u201d<\/strong><\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Here is what you should do when you feel sadness:<\/p>\n\n\n\n